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  • Kam Birdee-Wright

Judgement

Have you ever wanted to do something, something, that really brings you to life and you can feel the excitement within as you think about it? It brings something inside you alive, maybe a warm tingling feeling comes over you as the joy of this something feels tangible.


Your heart is racing with excitement as you think about it, and you can see it in your minds eye, you know it’s there, and you can achieve having this something.


You visualise a life with this something (job, car, holiday, idea, goal), and the more you think about it, the more realistic it becomes and you know you can almost taste it, as you’re so close.


But then, something, stops you. Right there, something stops you. All the excitement of that fire within begins to fade away. You’re attempting to conjure up these exciting feelings, but, something bigger and what feels stronger, stops you in your track.


Bang! There it is.


It’s so big at times and it has such a power over you, your something exciting to do gets buried away, deep, deep down within and it feels like it’s been sent to another world.


And do you find, there’s an emptiness which has replaced it? And do you find, like I have done, that maybe you were perhaps a little scared of what other people may think if you had that something in your life? And do you know what something might be?


Judgement.


The fear of what others think can stop us right in our tracks from doing something which brings us alive. The sensation and excitement knowing we can achieve what we want to, knowing we have the passion to bring it to life, knowing we have the tools, but, judgement rears its filthy head.


Can you relate to this?


How many times have you put your dreams/goals to one side, because the fear , is much stronger?


How many times have you watched people around you achieve great things, and even though you are achieving great things, you simply cannot move beyond this judgement?


How many times have you found yourself making an excuse or finding reason as to why you simply can’t do it?


I swear I could feel it within me. There was what feels like a foot long, four-inch-deep and six-inch-wide lead plate sitting from my throat to my lower abdomen. It was so firmly placed on my being, that I found it a challenge to move around.


You see, I have big dreams and even bigger goals. I have done, much inner work, to shift the layers of programming and conditioning, released the beliefs which hold me back, but a few days ago, this fear crept up on me.


And by being judged by others, I began judging myself. Do you find that happens too? My mind went into a whole barrage of self-talk with the whole, ‘who do you think you are to have this’; or ‘people will stop talking to you if you do this’; 'people will laugh and make jokes at you’; and ‘what if I get it wrong’.


These are all tangible conversations and feelings and as they popped up, the metal plate felt heavier and heavier, to the point that it was bothering me so much, I had difficulty breathing.


A succession of memories of the times I had made mistakes and all the other things I had attempted to create which didn’t go the way I wanted, came bubbling to the surface.


I felt sick. So much so that I felt the need to vomit.


But I didn’t. Instead, I came back to my breath and focused on my heart beat. It reminds me that all is well. I’ve got the tools to step beyond this and now have the space to move forwards as more time is becoming available to me.


Have you had something similar happen? A time when you were reminded of your failures than successes and this threw you into a spiral of thoughts which prevented your from moving forwards. But is it really you telling yourself, or is it a memory which goes back to a time when someone judged you?


Maybe that judgement still sits within your psyche and it is now an anchor which holds you back, again and again.


These judgements made by others can truly sink deep. Skin deep. I know in the past, I have been reduced to tears and locked myself away from the world as the judgements were quite painful.


For some, they are so frightened of being judged, they live a life of conformity and live their lives according to what people expect them to be doing. But does that make them happy?

Would that make you happy?


We live in a world where we are judged continuously. Attempting to be yourself in a world which quickly judges you for the way you dress; your body shape; culture; creed; religion; what you eat; the way you wear your hair; your job; your home; where you shop, is downright exhausting. Yet, it is achievable.


I stopped attempting to fit into a system which was unsupportive of my Authenticity.


People are still continuously attempting to stop me up from being myself. But I like to grow and expand my consciousness and I have gone beyond this as fitting in, would probably shut me down and turn me into a recluse from society.


By pushing past the lead plate in my being, I am creating freedom of judging and being judged. Freedom to do what I love and that is Unlocking Your Limitless Potential, writing and speaking my Truth.


There is a famous book, ‘feel the fear and do it anyway’. Whilst this book has much credibility, some people may want to do some inner work to shift the blocks too, and push past the fear of judgement from others and self.


You and I have a purpose on this Earth, and I know you have the courage, strength, ability and passion to push past any judgements and go and do what brings you to life. You have and you can.


Harm no one. Hurt no one. Be conscious. Live a life which supports you and others. Be an inspiration to others and shine brightly so others may see you and go courageously to live a life of passion and authenticity.


I am, are you?


Kam Birdee-Wright

Catalyst for Change

Unlocking Your Limitless Potential



Catalyst for Change

Unlocking Your Limitless Potential



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